Best GPU Neoclouds 2026: CoreWeave, Nebius, Lambda, Crusoe, and Groq Ranked by Published Pricing and Contracted Power

- Five GPU neoclouds walked into 2026 and somehow none of them are pretending to be DeFi anymore. CoreWeave posts $2.575B Q2 revenue, a $104B backlog, and the only Platinum SemiAnalysis rating — so naturally it charges a 10–15% premium, because nothing says "aggressive passive income" like pricing above everyone and still getting the anchor deals. Nebius has the cheapest H100 at $3.85/hr and is the only one publishing B300 pricing, which is either transparency or a flex. Lambda wins cheapest B200 at $6.69/hr but has no spot tier — enjoy that on-demand tax, meat wallet. Crusoe is the lone wolf running AMD MI300X/MI355X on its rate card, with 4.9 GW contracted and a 40 GW pipeline that sounds like someone didn't read the manifest. Groq licensed its LPU tech to NVIDIA for a reported $20B, then pivoted to inference cloud like a truth smuggler who just got paid to keep talking. The real signal: CoreWeave carries $31B in recourse debt and still commands