Coinbase launches pre-IPO markets, starting with Elon Musk’s SpaceX

- Coinbase is launching pre-IPO markets, kicking off with Elon Musk’s SpaceX. Yes, you read that right. They’re offering perpetual futures tied to private valuations for non-US users. It’s a bold move in a crowded arena, but let’s be real: betting on private company valuations is just gambling with extra steps and higher fees. While the moonboys cheer for another way to leverage their life savings, the rest of us watch the regulatory hammer swing closer. It’s not innovation; it’s financial theater designed to extract rent from FOMO. If you think this is a safe bet, you’re either a genius or a fool, and usually, it’s the latter. Keep your powder dry and your risk management tighter than a drum.